Lesson the first:

Do not drop your iPod in the toilet.

Go ahead, ask me how I know.  Verdict to follow assaulting it with a hairdryer and a nervous help-me conversation with Mr. McGee (giver of the sad, drowned iPod).  I'm hoping it lives, because otherwise, it's going to be very hard to convince myself I don't need an iPhone, which will cost me more money than I want to spend, please and thank you.

I shall return with actual content shortly.